Aurora Borealis

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions”

                                                      -Rainer Maria Rilke

I'm finding that these days I have more questions than answers. The fact that my life has taken a detour and that I am no longer in a relationship, I am no longer a teacher, I am no longer certain of my next move is both liberating and frightening. I've been thinking about heartbreak and love, researching grad schools and writing and brainstorming the new look of my life. I have oh so many questions.

Where will I live?

Where will I work?

Who will I meet?

Will I find another love?

What challenges will I face?

When will I have a plan? 

I've heard many writers speak of, "filling the well," meaning the time before writing when you research and brainstorm and contemplate before setting out to write. Filling the well fuels the massive outpouring of writing and written work-flow that follows it. I feel that this time in my life I am filling the well. Not just to write but to make my next leap. 

"Leap and the net will appear." -John Burroughs

The net of my thoughts is being created, strengthened and elongated so that when I get to the action steps I will not touch the ground. I will fly along on my hopes, my wishes and my dreams, bouncing on the net I've made and if I fall from the edge I will be prepared.

I've learned so much in the past two years. I've learned enough that now when I feel panicky it is not about who I am but how many things I could be doing and how to pick wisely. Never have I felt more self-possessed. I am full of gratitude that The Artist's Way,  Mondo Beyondo and Creative Awakenings have given such fuel to my creative fire and I am excited about the adventures that lie ahead.

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I'm living the questions. Are you?